Crazy thoughts

Recently, my mind has been filled with lots of negative stuffs. I have been think a lot, day and night. Even when I am working, I am thinking. Times have passed and things have changed. Many things were no longer the same. I dare to say that I have tried, and I am still trying. Those thoughts, they have been haunting me. I am afraid, afraid that things might not be in my favour. Afraid of so many things, which includes what I have held on to for almost 3 years. 

I have no idea if it is because that I feel lonely or whatsoever, but I really wish for all these crazy thoughts to migrate elsewhere. When I see how happy and blissful other people are, I cannot help but wonder what have became of my own. 

Despite all these, I have no intention of letting go. At least not yet. I have let go twice, and I am not going to make similar decisions. Because the last time I did, I realised I am the only one hurting. I will be cautious this time round. I will not make the same mistakes again. Because I realised that you are my everything; my oxygen, my laughter, my happiness.